Who are you Trying to Impress?

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Who are you trying to impress? A question I am constantly hearing...not necessarily geared toward me, but anyone who puts an effort into getting ready to run some standard errands. This is a turn of phrase that is, in my opinion, constantly overused.

What if the answer is "myself"? What if I am simply trying to impress myself? What if I want to spend time getting ready so that when I walk by a mirror or see my reflection in the supermarket cooler doors (sounds incredibly vain, I know) I can stand up a little straighter. Here's the deal, I don't know a single person that will not look at themselves in a mirror, in passing. We are human, we were literally created to be flawed. Some would say needing to feel a sense of confidence is a flaw, but we all need it! Self confidence is an incredibly important attribute that we humans need to succeed and thrive in this life.

Those who lack self confidence (myself included...thank you anxiety) will rely on other people's opinions to guide them. Doing such a thing takes away your individuality - what makes you special. Allowing others to guide you with their criticisms (whether they say its "constructive" or not) breaks you, and can ultimately lead to depression.

I have been there. It is not a fun place to be. DO NOT let someone else take you there. You are a perfectly imperfect person. Your individuality is what makes you beautiful, no matter what anyone else has to say about it.

A self confident person has confidence literally pouring out of them - OK not literally, but you get my point. When you see a confident person, you don't have to wonder if they care what other people think. The only opinion these people care about is their own, they allow their own thoughts to guide them...and no one else's.

Believe it or not...dressing to impress oneself is scientifically labeled as 'enclothed cognition'. Scientists have defined this phenomenon as "the systematic influence that clothes have on the wearer's psychological processes". Clothing is symbolic, defining who we are. What we choose to wear and how we decide to look will reflect and affect our mood. And, in turn, affecting our health and confidence.

Taking this scientific phenomenon a step further, Professor Karen J. Pine found that "when we put on a piece of clothing, we cannot help but adopt some of the characteristics associated with it, even if we are unaware of it".

We reflect what we wear and how we choose to look, every single day. I choose to, at the very least, do my hair even on days when I don't have the slightest desire to do anything but be a lazy sack of potatoes...don't judge.

Despite what I intend to do every day, whether its being a lazy sack of potatoes or being a boss babe, I dress to reflect who I am and how I feel. I want to look good every day, because I want to feel good every day. On my lazy days, you better believe my hair will be done and I will have a cute "lazy day" outfit on.

We shouldn't be made to feel like we need to dress to impress anyone but ourselves. We shouldn't be judged by others for wanting to look good, even if we are just running to the grocery store and back home. We shouldn't care about turning anyone's head, but our own. We should be able to see our reflection and LOVE what we see!

I hope to, one day, no longer hear the phrase: Who are you trying to impress? We shouldn't care if anyone is trying to impress someone else, as long as they are considering themselves. Dress to impress yourself, and the rest will follow. After all, Bestey Johnson said it best...
"Girls do not dress for boys. They dress for themselves. Of course. If girls dressed for boys, they'd just walk around naked all the time." 

 Love Always,
                         Kaitlyn B

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